I recently spent one month in the south of France with the original goal to perfect my French... but also indulging in the European sun by the mediterranean sea. I believe this has been or is a dream of absolutely everyone in this world at some point in their lives. I barely did any research before my trip - I just booked a place on Air B&B that was close to the beach and set off. I was completely winging it, taking it day by day. 

Although I was considering potentially moving to the South of France later down the track to learn more about the French lifestyle, I did find after this month that this was no longer in my plans. It was a beautiful holiday destination and I was so lucky to have spent longer than most people do for just a holiday. I may have found that this wasn't the place for me if I had done some research beforehand, however it was incredibly liberating to be able to go out of comfort zone, be completely alone in a foreign country with a language I didn't really know. 

The lesson for me in this experience was that not every decision we make turns out as we think it might, but as long as you are not hurting anyone or yourself, just do it anyway! It's so much better to just DO WHAT WE WANT TO DO without overthinking the consequences, and making the most of it... without regret. This experience has made me realise I can do whatever I want to do, no matter how scary it may seem to me, despite how far it is out of my comfort zone and regardless of how many people tell me how silly I am for doing it. 

Visiting Italy has been a dream of mine for as long as I can remember, and it was the vision that I would visit this dream land one day that kickstarted and fueled my travelling passion. I had the absolute gift of visiting Italy in their scorching summer and was able to visit it with some friends, and my sister who is a master planner and packed in a visit to what felt like 100 cities in a matter of 2 weeks. We were on the go, sweating and panting the entire time, discovering the many personalities of this country that was once just a dream to me. Although I loved travelling Italy and exploring this corner of the world, it didn't feel like the homecoming I was expecting. I'd always felt like I related so well to Italian lifestyle, the food, the culture, the beautiful sites and the people... from what I'd read and heard. But you never really know until you're in the situation yourself. Italy was a dream destination for me and I am so excited to return and visit more of the different areas of the country, but as a traveller and a wanderer, and not as a resident, as I had initially intended. 

The experience made me think about how I had such a grasp on 'destination happiness'. That is, I thought I would somehow feel like all the questions I had would be answered once visiting this country and fulfilling my dream. I was further confused when I came back to Sydney and felt even more displaced than when I left. 

I have never really felt like I belonged, and that was not news to me. Instead I started to think about all the times I did felt like I belonged, and that was to moments and people, not to places. I feel like I'm home when I watch the sunset, taking the first dip into the ocean and then diving headfirst, walking out of the an airport into a new country and feeling the temperate in the air, falling asleep in his arms with our hands held in each other's. It was clear to me that I really don't feel like I belong very often, but in these moments I feel like I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be and that's worth holding on to. And more to the point, it's worth chasing to feel alive.